Speaking Frankly

Disclaimer - Very personal post however I needed to share since I view this as my electronic diary of our family's journey.

Even though God has provided me with all of the things I have asked for...a beautiful family, a man that loves my children and I, financial stability etc. I sometimes take these blessings for granted.

My insecurities push me to want to define things with titles such as girlfriend, fiance, wife, parent etc. For some odd reason I weigh my relationship on how it is presented to others upon introduction for example "Please meet Peta-Gay my friend" (not the introduction I want) or "Please meet Peta-Gay my fiance/wife" (not a factual introduction). I have been a wife for so long that I can not think outside of the title realm however this morning William and I had a very frank discussion because he wanted me to realize that it is the actions that qualify titles not the mere allocation of one. He specifically pointed out that he is a parent to Vanessa and Jade because he is the one that helps them with their homework, picks them up from school, read books/bedtime stories to them, provide financially and emotionally for them so regardless of whether others think he is a parent to them he knows he is because of the actions being performed.

He further shared with me that only I can make myself happy, regardless of whether I am dating someone or even if it is something more than dating, there is no guarantee of happiness because only I can make myself happy. Initially, I was upset to hear this because I saw it as him "picking on me" but having thought about it for eight plus hours I realize that his words are very true. I must work on being happy and comfortable with myself in order to share myself with others.